The Whisperer

I have a small head.

And because of this, my headset does not fit properly. Instead of wearing it like a normal receptionist, I hold the earpiece up to one ear with my hand, and talk this way. Occasionally I'll throw the headset on to wear it normally, but usually it tends to slide off my head so I just rather hold it in place. Annoying? Extremely. Especially when you use a keyboard to type in the person's name to transfer a call.

So what does any of this have to do with The Whisperers?
Well, let me introduce you to to the 2 types of whisperers I have in my office:

1. Someone who when talking to you, about everyday
normal things, whispers instead of speaks:

2. People who comes into the lobby, stand next
to my desk and whispers back and forth so no one
(more specifically, me) can hear them




So today, I had the lovely pleasure of dealing with a lady who likes to whispers. I understand that sometimes when I do actually wear the headset, it can be confusing whether or not I'm actually on the phone. Because of this, I usually take off the headset immediately after being on a call (actually, I just do this because the headset doesn't fit, but let's pretend I do it to be nice to other people.)

Some days I'll even be on the phone, wearing the headset and people will start to talk to me, or whisper, asking if I can open the door for them. A whisper in this case is completely acceptable, since I'm busy and I can easily help them without talking back to them. However, today I got the lady that actually needed a response. I'm on the phone, attempting to wear the headset, when this lady comes up to me and starts whispering away. She's so faint that I barely even notice she's there, or that she's talking to me. So I end the call, can sense she's still standing to my side, remove the headset and turn to her. Key word being I REMOVED the head set.

So as I ask her what's up, she leans forwards (which naturally causes me to lean back) and whispers something. Um what? What did you just say?? She repeats herself and I catch something about if I know who Lisa is and her desk. I assume she's looking to see if I know where she sits in the office. I give her directions to the payroll office and if I didn't know that someone usually says "thank you" after someone helps them out, I would have no idea what she said.

I mean, I think that's what she said. And I think that's what she asked.... haha! For all I know she could have asked me to do something and I literally just sent her away. I know this whisperer, and I've heard her speak normally. I'm confused as to if she just thought I was still on the phone or perhaps she was just nervous to be talking to such an important lady such as myself ;)

Either way, she earned herself a nickname.

Case of the Mondays

So I might not have any TPS reports to do, but definitely had a case of the Mondays. Remember in Office Space when Peter, Michael Bolton and Samir went to town on that printer? I honestly think I would have given anything to be able to beat my printer today. Check out 1, of the 2, error messages I was getting:



I know it's hard to read, so I'll translate: "PAPER JAM". As you can clearly see, there is NO PAPER in the tray below. I got the error message, removed all the paper, checked to make sure that there wasn't actually a jam, and pressed "OK".

Fail.

The error message kept repeating. And when I finally thought I had fixed it from continuously pressing OK, and even turning off the printer multiple times, a new error message appeared. "Cartridge Jam"

Are you serious???

I placed a help desk ticket in with IT, and of course the printer decided to work (only after I said I was going to kill it.) But to my surprise, about 45 minutes later, the same error messages appeared. I can only hope IT will be able to fix it tomorrow, or someday soon.... However, I think I much rather take a bat to it.

Anyone want in?

You're A Dumb Ass

Apparently I'm a dumb ass.

Crazy caller: "I have been calling for 3 days in a row to talk to someone about my W2, and all I get is voice mails!"

Um, it's Tuesday. There's no way you've been calling 3 days in a row, and if you have, obviously on Sunday you got voice mails.

Me: "Ok, well all W2 calls go to the w2 hot line, so you will have to leave a message if no one picks up."

I know, I'm awful.

Crazy Caller: "You mean there's no live person for me to talk to??"

Ding Ding Ding

Me: "That's correct"

While I agree that getting a voicemail in this situation is not helpful, it's the only option.

Crazy Caller: "So what do I do?? I need to speak to a person!!!!!"

Me, pausing....

Crazy Caller: "If you were me, what would you do?"

Me: "I would just keep leaving messages, since there's no other option"

Crazy Caller: "You're a dumb ass."

CLICK! (aka the crazy lady hung up on me). Not really sure why that makes me a dumb ass, but apparently I am.

Welcome to my day, hope yours was better!

The Troll

Happy New Year Everyone! I know I've been MIA lately, but I'm back. And what better way to start the new year than to introduce you to...

The Troll!

There's a woman I used to call the troll, and she didn't even work for the company. Her husband did. While he no longer works for us, I feel that it's completely acceptable to talk about her. The reason behind the nickname was simple, she decided to dye her hair 4 different colors. Pink on one half, purple on the other, blonde for her bangs, and black in the back. She's 30, a little larger than most and had been unemployed since January 09, when I met her. She would come into the lobby everyday with her husband, sign in and then go sit at his desk with him while he worked all day long.

Yup, she sat at his desk with him. How is this allowed you ask? Well, turned out it isn't!

She was told she couldn't sit there anymore. So where did she end up? Oh that's right, IN THE LOBBY! WITH ME! So the same thing happened, she would walk in with her husband, sign the guest book and take a seat in the lobby. She would sit there until lunch time, when he would come get her and they'd go out to eat, come back and sit there until he left for the day, around 230-3pm. (yeah, let's not even get into his schedule!)

At first she would sit there with her crossword puzzle or book that she brought in. Eventually she realized she was bored of them and realized, hey! There's someone else in the lobby, maybe we should talk! I learned everything about this woman. And I mean, everything. How long she had been without a job, found out all about their cats and fish they have. How her brother has the same name as her husband - how funny is that? I would hear about her evenings, or upcoming plans. Those of you who know me know this would drive me insane. I'm still trying to figure out why people think I'm nice and what to hear all about their life!

Co-workers would come into the lobby and do a double take. Everyone would give me weird looks as if she was my friend, just hanging out with me. It was eventually reported to her husband's boss that she was just loitering in the lobby, and from there she still continued to come to work with him, she would just sit in the car.

Yes, you read that correctly. She would sit in her car ALL DAY LONG. Why would anyone in their right mind do this?? Why wouldn't you just stay home? Think of all the jobs she could have been applying too!!

Unfortunately for her, they would park their car in the front of the building and people inside could see her sitting, eating, sleeping and reading all day long. It also happened to be the windows to the department her husband worked for.

I'm not exactly sure what happened, or if his wife had any reason to do with his "departure" from my work, but one day they were both gone. I even got sent a confidential email from HR informing me that he was no longer allowed on the property and to call the office manager right away if he came back.

I never did find out what caused him to get fired, but only can only believe his wife played a factor. Luckily for me, I was able to take a picture of her sitting in the lobby (without her knowing, of course!) and show her to all my friends and family. At least her being in the lobby wasn't a complete waste of my time ;)