I need to bring a resume??

So today a young girl (definitely in her 20's) came in for an interview, and I hope for sake of this company we don't hire her. I'm not just saying that to be mean. There are certain things you should know before going to an interview.

That being said, bringing your resume should be number one on your list.

Yes, that's right. She didn't bring her resume because she assumed we would print it out because, and I quote, "isn't that why you submit your resume, for the interviewer to have a copy?" she asked. She didn't even look embarrassed when the recruiter looked at her funny when she mentioned she didn't bring any copies of her resume, or even get nervous when the recruiter told her that she should always bring a resume to every job interview. I'm pretty sure I would have wanted to die and walk out, knowing I messed up and most likely would not be getting the job. Not this girl, I don't think she even realized she did anything wrong.

Now, I don't know about you, but when I was in college, I had to take a writing class where we worked on resumes and even did mock cover letters and pretend interviews. Besides learning the basics of what to wear and how to present yourself, it was always implied you brought your resume, with extra copies, along with your references.

To this girl's defense, after reading her resume (yes, I have the power to do that), it looks like this might even be her first real interview. The job she currently has, she had while in college as an internship, so I'll assume that she got that job just because a full time position once she graduated. But seriously, is it just me or does it seem crazy to not bring your resume?!?

But what do I know? I'm just the receptionist ;)

It's getting hot in here!

I love the summer. What I don't love is sitting in a lobby, with huge windows in front of me, staring at the gorgeous weather. It's 90 degrees, and altho everyone is complaining how gross it is outside, I'm so happy that summer is here. :)

One of the most interesting thing about working in a corporate office during summer is learning, and seeing, a lot more about your co-workers. Once the warm weather comes, the tattoos are revealed and the layers come off! I was in the lunch room, putting my sandwich together, when Annie walked in to the vending machine. Her shirt was a little to short to be tucked in and when she bent over to get her 100 calorie snack pack, I learned that she has a lovely tramp stamp! A pleasant start to my lunch break! Over the years, I've seen foot and ankle tattoos that have been hiding all winter, and was shocked to find out that our quiet, very professional, i-wear-a-suit-everyday corporate lawyer sports tattoos all over both his forearms, one on his calf and one around his ankle. I learned this due to Friday's casual day - and Mr. Lawyer wore a t-shirt and man shorts. I also hear his chest covered, and his upper arms as well, due to some people that saw him rock a tank top at the gym. No wonder he wears long sleeves everyday! I do find him to be a lot cooler now that I know he's covered in tats ;)

I'm also amazed by the amount of co-workers that come into work in the most inappropriate outfits during the summer. I'm all for short shorts, but to work? really? One lady came in wearing a halter dress, not that bad, right? Maybe pair it up with a cardigan to cover up? But I'll let it fly that she has nothing as a cover up because that's not the worst part. This lady isn't exactly flat chested, and I'm not even positive she's got a bra on. Now, I know it's hot out, and normally it'd be a cute summer dress, but that doesn't mean you should show off the goods to all your co-workers.

I also get to see a lot of female co-workers legs! Oh how the male population at the office must love this season - we get to see pale legs, hairy legs, stubby legs, thin legs, orange self tanner legs! everything! I usually don't tend to show my legs, I like to just wear pants year round because the AC is FREEZINGGG (and not to mention I'm not trying to impress anyone here at work), but on the very off chance that I decide a skirt is needed (and so far its happened only once), my legs were most definitely shaved. And, I don't go around announcing that I haven't shaved my legs in over a week. Gross, people!

Apparently there's also no rule on how short your skirt or dress can be. Our office is "business casual" but it seems once the weather turns nice its almost a game to see who can get away with wearing the least. I'm gonna bet I won't win this game ;)

Delivery Boys

You know in the movie 'Legally Blonde' how there's a hot UPS delivery guy that comes in daily? Where does that happen?! Please tell me so I can get a job there. The past couple times my bestie has gone to a local sub shop for lunch, she runs into the same hot foreign guy ordering a sandwich. WTH! Where is my daily hot guy? I should clarify, where is my daily hot guy that makes working 8 hours more enjoyable? (And uh...to my boyfriend, if you're reading this, just ignore that last sentence :) love you!)

But seriously, I do not get any perks of seeing any good looking UPS drivers, delivery boys, or random people coming in for meetings or interviews! So unfair. The worst is the sketchy delivery guys who make me so uncomfortable I wish I could just get up and leave the lobby. Some of them try to chat with me, and ALL of them like to stand RIGHT next to me while waiting for the person who ordered food to come out. I can smell their nasty cologne - remember in 8th grade when boys learned about cologne and pretty much showered in that? yeah, its WORSE than that. I could punch them by just moving my arm to the left, and I'm pretty sure they're looking down my shirt, since I'm sitting and they're standing. These guys are just so creepy. I cringe when I see one coming in. I can't even begin to explain just how much I dread the 5 minutes I sit waiting for whoever ordered to come out and get their food.

Lots of them think they're so cool, and probably think they're doing me a service by coming in and gracing me with their presence. One creepy older looking guy tried to get me interested in talking to him by informing me he's a bartender on the weekends, and ya know what? He'll hook me up with free drinks - just come in with all my girlfriends. Oh sure, this sounds like a GREAT idea - my friends and I love creepy delivery men/bartenders!

While trying to tell him, thanks but NO THANKS, I get the reply "what? you dont like to go out on weekends? you don't party?" Umm, if by you thinking I don't party means I don't have to continue this conversation, then yes, yes, I hate going out on weekends. "Here let me give you my number so you can call me when you're coming in town" What??? Gross! Trust me, that sticky note was immediately thrown out, and the rest of my note pad was moved far far far away to the corner of my desk that only I can reach.

Being the mastermind that I am, I've even started pretending that I'm on the phone just so I don't have to have any conversation with them - who does that?! THIS GIRL! Such a brilliant plan. And if this starts to fail, I think I'll start pretending I have turrets :)

So, to all you delivery people out there: Leave us receptionists alone! ;) Unless you're Johnny Depp, or any other hot rich actor, just don't even bother. I'm paid to act pleasant to guests, it doesn't mean I like you. Unless we start a conversation with you, just do us a favor and don't speak. And always, always!!! stand at least 5 feet away. :)

Houston, We're Ready for Takeoff!

So, like any hard working girl I like to have web Sudoku up at all times so I can play a game or two in my "down time". I'm the master of Sudoku. I credit my job for allowing me to advance my skill and technique in this game. I've learned how to do this game pretty fast as well, I get over 300 calls a day, so I really don't have a lot of time to ponder what number can go where. Due to the high volume of calls I receive daily, you can see how frustrating it is when you're trying to figure out if it’s the 8 or 9 that goes in that square when the phone rings and messes you up.

To catch you up to speed, I answer the phone through my computer, more specifically my keyboard. Since the phone's program is through my computer I don't actually pick up a receiver, or even use a standard phone. I actually don't know how I would even transfer a phone call if I wasn't able to type their name in and hit enter! Anyways, here's my story.

So it was after my lunch break (aka my 30 minutes of bliss), when I sat back at my desk. I logged back into my emails, and immediately popped up a Sudoku screen and started in on my puzzle. Now I'm weird that when I have a blank square, and it’s not an obvious answer, I count down from 9 to determine what numbers can go there. One would think that once the phone rings, and I have to switch over to that screen, I would just stay on that screen until finished with the call. Nope, not this girl. I do the quick alt-tab trick and immediately go back to my game, totally forgetting that I'm even on the phone. So instead of answering the phone like I normally do, the caller got a great earful of me going "Hmm..9-8-7-6...uh... Good Afternoon, thank you for calling...."

YES. You read that correctly, I answered the phone while doing a COUNT DOWN! I can't even imagine what the caller thought was wrong with me.

Luckily the caller only laughed for a couple seconds before asking for the payroll department. I guess this is what I get for all those times I laughed at those callers that I have caught singing on the other end. But seriously, that cannot be as bad as a friggin count down! There really is no way to come back from that. As my co-worker Ben pointed out later when I relayed the story, I should have said sure, let me transfer you in 3-2-1 to complete the countdown.

Maybe I should look for a future in becoming an announcer for NASA: "The space shuttle will begin take off in 9-8-7..."

Sketchers

You've probably seen these shoes around - or even own some yourself. The more and more I see these shoes, the more ridiculous I think they look. The website claims that due to their rounded sole, it causes you to roll forward making you shift your weight. You then are able to center yourself by using your core muscles. This results in a firmer legs, butt, back and abs, all without ever stepping in a gym! This sounds.... fantastic! Now if they really worked, and didn't look so hideous, I'm sure I would have already bought my own! So instead of trying these sneakers out myself, I've decided to watch one female co-worker (nicknamed Sketchers, for obvious reasons) that has bought them. Sketchers has recently come back from maternity leave - her second child in under a year....seriously...back to back pregnancies, its like she's been pregnant foreverrrr.

Now I understand how one would want to get their "pre-pregnant" body back. But does one actually think that simply wearing these sneakers will magically make the weight come off? Of course they do! So without fail, everyday Sketch comes rolling in, only to head straight for the elevator. I'm pretty sure there needs to be walking involved for these things to actually work.

But a-ha! That's the trick! Sketch CAN'T walk in these things! According to their site, it seems like this could be a potential problem for a lot of people! They actually advise you to "moderate your walking routine for the first week or two, depending on your level of fitness. As you continue to wear your shape ups, your body will adjust to this new method of walking." LOL what?!? I refuse to believe that its actually difficult to adjust to walking in these moon boots!

I haven't noticed any difference in Sketcher's appearance, nor was I expecting to. The only time I see her is when she's running for the elevator, or swaying side to side to the vending machine for some candy. I don't know what I'll be more impressed with - her actually losing weight, or learning to master walking in those things. Until then, I'll just keep laughing at her :)

Smokers part deux

How could I forget to mention this?!?
One of the GRRRRREAT qualities of one of these smokers is that she loves to tell me what the weather is. More specifically, if it's snowing or not. As you know, it's June. It hasn't snowed in a while. To her credit, she's been telling me whether its snowing or not ever since the first snow fall last year. But honestly, I sit in the lobby with huge windows right in front of me. I don't need to know the weather, I can see it! Every day when she waddles by, I cringe knowing the fact that when she comes back into the office, I'm going to get an update on whether or not its snowing. The first time it happened, it was "funny". It was during a huge blizzard, so I thought she was telling me being all sarcastic.

Nope.

She was actually being serious, and I have absolutely no idea to get her to stop. I've gone from being nice to just plain old mean - I don't smile, laugh, even acknowledge her when she walks by, yet, she still talks to me as if I care. So I guess I need YOUR help...what do I do to get this wheezing, smoking... thing to stop? Thoughts?

The Smokers

Every office has them, and I've decided I want to be one.

No weather is too extreme for a cigarette to be left in their pack. These men and women are dedicated to damaging their lungs, and wont let a silly thing like snow, rain, freezing temperatures or humid days stop them. For sake of my blog, last week I researched just how often these smokers go outside for a break, and how long they last. My results are truly amazing, and besides the horrible side effects (cancer, death...) I conclude that all workers should smoke!

My research includes the 3 women smokers that regularly go outside, and I'm lead to believe that if we all took as many breaks as these women do, there is no way any work would ever get done! In fact, I'm surprised they get anything done now - maybe they work late to make up the time? HA!

Here are the amazing stats to back my desire to smoke:
Monday - they spent a total of 42 mins outside
Tuesday - 40 mins
Wednesday - 48 mins
Thursday - 48 mins
Friday - 36 mins

And I even have it broken down to the precise minutes they were outside, and they seem to have a set time reserved to smoke. Their breaks seem to be around 9:30am, 11:30am, 1:30pm and 3:30pm lasting anywhere from 8-16 minutes. So, if we add all that time together, that's 3.5hrs a week they spend on just smoking alone! That doesn't include their lunch break, bathroom breaks, getting up for more water or coffee, just smoking!

As a receptionist, I get to sit in the lobby by the front entrance all day long. Lucky me gets to experience these lovely ladies first hand. If the stench of them wasn't bad enough, I get the pleasure of having them talk to me, and getting to experience their leathery faces and yellow teeth. Not to mention listening to one of them hack up a lung every time she tries to speak. So attractive and sexy!

...Ok, so maybe I won't become a smoker anytime soon, maybe I'll just be a faker, and only be a smoker on the nice hot sunny days. I could use the extra 3.5 hours a week in the sun to work on my tan ;)