Turn Lights one in the morning

This is an actual email from our office manager. Sent to both myself and Bill, who both arrive to work at 7:30am everyday.

"Hello,
Doug (the CEO) would like ether of you, whoever comes in first, to turn on all the lights in the halls ways, Please make sure this is done every morning from now on.

Thanks"
Jim | Manager, Office Services

Let's discuss:
Uhhh... clearly you didn't read over your title of the email. Turn lights one? Maybe he means to turn them on?
Why is Lights capitalized?
Um, what the heck does ether have to do with this?
What the heck are hallsways?
Why can't the CEO turn the lights on himself?
Why can't Jimmy (as he calls himself) come in at a normal time and do such things?
Why did Jimmy come in at 11:38 today and leave at 4:27? (Yes, that's almost 5 hours. We're proud of him)
How does he make more money than me when he can't write emails?

WHY AM I STILL WORKING HERE???