Under Construction

My office is under construction. Instead of moving to a new location that can fit all of us, they've decided to demo the entire inside and rebuild everything. Sure, why not. However, because of this, it is very noisy, very messy and full of lovely construction workers. Joy.

The lobby is getting the majority of the noise. I'm not really sure why, but first they were doing demo/construction above me, then the department directly behind me, and now they're removing bricks on the outside of the building?? which of course, is the wall on the outside of the lobby.

Of course.

So, my company, being the dorky company they are gave us a "present" for putting up with the noise. Check it out below:
Yup, that's a lunch box that contained a t-shirt with the company's logo (because you know I want to wear that everywhere), a stress ball shaped like a hard helmet, ear plugs, Advil and an ice pack since our fridges are disappearing.

The best part? Some people actually put that shirt on OVER their other shirt. NG was beyond exciting to get a present, and I didn't even open it until I got home.

I'd like to say its fun the company does this, but seriously? What a waste of money!! My review/raise is coming up. Save the money and put it towards that instead. Mmmk? OkThanksBye.

Walking while... computing?

Ok, I don't have a laptop at work. And I don't have a lot of important meetings that I have to attend, especially ones where I would need to bring a laptop to. However, if I did, I would not be one of the cool kids at work that walks around, with their laptop wide open, looking like the biggest losers on the planet. I'm serious. How dumb are you trying to look?!

What is so important that it can't wait the 5 minutes for you to walk to the conference room and set up your computer? Nothing screams nerd like carrying your open laptop in one arm, and typing with the other.

I just don't get it.

Is it just me being mean? Which, we alllllllllll know is the most likely scenario, but really? Close your computer, carry it like a normal person and walk to the meeting. Most likely you'll get there and you won't have missed an email.

And for those out there that are "reviewing over the contents of the meeting". You are so lame. You're fine, the meeting will be fine. There's nothing you can do now to add on to the handout/spreadsheet/powerpoint anyways, so why bother??

Am I the only one that feels like this!?

Guest Blogger #2

YAY! another follower wants to share their story. Enjoy! :)

i picked up a shift tonight for one of my cases. great family, i love coming in here. if i didn't have to be at the hospital, i'd come work here every night. got a call from the case coordinator earlier in the week saying that the regular mon-thur girl quit and they need me to train a nurse to take those nights. i hate training newbies...they're way to excited and full of stupid questions. and yes, there are stupid questions, but i'll save the july-august resident stories for another time.

anyways, the case coordinator sends me an email saying newbie will be coming out at 9pm for 4-5 hours. say what, mofo?!! 4 hours?! that is WAY too long. no way...this cannot happen. after i get the baby settled, i crack open my laptop, jump onto one of the neighbors unprotected wifi networks and use this time to catch up on my blog reading, send some emails, play a few rounds of words with friends with my brother-in law (who also works this horrific shift), whip up a few digital scrapbook pages and maybe, if the mood strikes, get some work done for next week's class. 4 hours with a newbie is going to put a major damper on my routine.

i call the office and let them know that i can get the training done in a hour max. thank god they go for it! fast forward to this evening. i arrive at 8:30 and have 30 minutes to get the baby asleep, start the tube feeding and hook up the monitors before newbie arrives. 9pm on the dot....she rings the doorbell. now, this particular doorbell isn't the regular "ding-dong" type...it plays a song. loudly. loud enough to wake a sleeping baby.

newbie is not so newbie.

she's in her 60's. late 60's. and she's got her super duper "i'm going to be on my feet for 12 hours" nursing shoes all shined and ready for action. i've already ditched my shoes and am running around in my socks, wishing i had brought my slippers. newbie stands there looking at me with a blank face...no introduction, no "hello"...nothing. i find this odd. most nurses are fairly chatty, but not newbie. dead silence in the hallway, so i introduce myself and suggest a tour (basically..."these are the stairs that bring you up to the baby's room") to get started. i show her around, tell her where everything is and go over the baby's situation. at one point, she takes my book light and used it to perform a thorough exam of the room. i'm not really sure what she was doing or looking for...it looked like some search technique she picked up from csi. this takes all of 25 minutes, so i grab the chart and decide to go through the paperwork with her.

she's still contributing zip to the conversation. nothing about her work history...which is usually the first thing nurses talk about...where we worked, wild stories that happened to us...absolutely nothing from newbie. i'm looking at the clock and it's 9:55. i'm ready for her to leave and comment, "wow! we're making good time here...you'll be out of here in just a few minutes!" most people would be psyched, but not newbie. her response?

wait for it...

"my ride is picking me up at 10:30." whaaaaat?! that's another 35 minutes! and why in the world do you have someone chauffeuring you around in the middle of the night?! i can feel my phone in my pocket vibrate and i know it's my turn to play words. i figure while i'm stuck with this lady, i might as well know more about her, so i start rapid fire questioning. where exactly have you worked? how long? have you ever done home care? are you a pediatric nurse? why the hell are you wearing those shoes?! okay, so i didn't ask the last one! never really got any clear answers from her. this was her FIRST home care case and she's never taken care of a patient under the age of 15. interesting. you'd think the agency might realize this wasn't a good match for a baby with a trach.

i get newbie ready to go and by the door at 10:25...just in time to see the short bus pull up to bring her home.

LOL, thanks RB - loved the story, keep them coming!

Words With Friends

Lately Bill and I haven't had our morning chat/breakfast. He's been pretty busy, and when he's not, I got NG with me. Of course, he comes by and chats when she's there, but it's just not the same. So today, when he sat down next to me this morning I was pretty happy. Then he whipped out scrabble cheez-its. Winning!

We decided to see who could "play" the dirtest word. While going back and forth, I took it literally and put down the word mudpie. While piling on swear words off that, Kaitlin came over to order her lunch. Bill and I pretty much ignored her while laughing and having a good time.

Then, she said it.

"OMG, I wish I was a receptionist so I could play games all day long!"

A what what?! Did she really just say that? Does she really think I play games all day? And why the hell DON'T i get to play games all day! haha! Oh that's right, because I'm forced to answer hundreds of phone calls, deal with rude mean people, do Kathy's job, and help NG learn the tricks of the trade all while pretending to be Ruby Sunshine.

So what did I say back? "OH, I'll GLADLY switch with you!"

She laughed, paid for lunch and walked away. I looked down at her lunch order and realized Kaitlin, an accountant for the company, was in fact, a complete moron. She's an accountant. She must be good with numbers right? NOPE. Somehow she decided that 7.49 + 1.50 (for tax/tip) was 9.50.

Yes, I think I will go back to playing games all day. I'm clearly smarter :)

Cookies n Cream Truffles

I think I could post about NG forever. Now, don't get me wrong, I like her. I like the girl a lot. She's funny, she's slowly beginning to realize our job sucks and that she's stuck dealing with dumb people all day.

However, she is killing me.

Today, she came in with 2 zip-lock containers full of cookie and cream truffles she made for people in the office. No, no, no!!! I quickly informed her that I hope she was prepared to see her 2 hours of labor go out the window in the 15 minutes it would take for everyone to inhale her treats.

"Oh, I'm prepared, I just want to entice people to come over to the desk and say hello to me"

What?! No! We don't want to feed the hungry hippos, keep them at their watering holes away from the reception desk (aka me!)

To much of my surprise, people didn't come rushing when they heard there was free food at reception. The truffles, as amazing as they were because you know I ate one (ok 2...don't judge!) were a little sweet and definitely wicked chocolately. So a lot of people didn't want to try something so chocolate heavy . Haha, seriously?? you'll eat catered food that's been left out for hours, but won't try some home made chocolate??

Now, while I understand her approach to have people come up to talk to her, she's making me look really really bad. I brought in candy once, around Halloween time, and the candy went so fast, I didn't know what the heck had happened. I swore I would never spend and waste money on food for people in the office again.

So what does NG do? Just that! And people LOVED it. They talked about how great and considerate she is, and wow, these are just so amazing, you have such a talent! Ruby... why haven't you ever done anything like this??

Ugh.

And of course I can't be mad at the girl, she's brand spanking new and still being in that I love work phase. But seriously. You're KILLING ME.

I think the only reason I'm still speaking to this girl is because the candy was really good. Altho, Bill pointed out that maybe she wants to fatten me up so she can be the cuter receptionist.

....great.

Stupid truffles. Excuse me, I need to go eat the 3rd one I snuck home with me.

Free Chicken!

It's the Friday before Labor Day weekend. Thank goodness for 3 day weekends! I felt like the only one in the office today, and while I ran back to the break room to fill up my water bottle I saw this sign hanging on the board.

I don't know what it means or why it was posted, but obvi I had to share.



...I work with weirdos. And yes, those are little chickens at the bottom you can tear off. Anyone know what this is?! Or is it just some dorky IT guy playing a joke on us all.

Who knows. It's a long weekend. That's all that matters :)

Have a safe and happy long weekend everyone! I'll be back on Tuesday! :)

Until then...

xoxo

UPDATE!

So... remember me posting about how I changed Bill's photo on the intranet to a glittery pink unicorn? Well......... today he found out his picture had been changed.

NG, as much as I like her, told Bill that she liked his photo on the site. Him, thinking it was his picture, got all proud and was like, ya? you like that? So, needless to say, he pulls up his information and BAM! there's a pic of a unicorn under his name.

Now, I'm sitting at Kathy's desk while this is all happening. I get rudely distracted from my lovely spreadsheet I'm working on, by a pen flying at my head.

"I'm mad at you"

Having no idea what he's talking about, I reply "Uhhh, why?? I responded to your email...."

"Do I look like a pink glittery unicorn to you?" To which, I start laughing. "I know you switched my photo!! you're laughing, you're so guilty!"

"I'm laughing because that's hilarious, why would I switch your photo??" I type his name into the system and pull up the photo. Our co-worker Tim comes over and, along with me, starts laughing.

"RUBY!! I know you did this, you're doing it to get back at me because I always switch your photo to Scarlett Johansson" (Yeah... I'm not sure why he does that either....kind of creepy)

"Bill, who told you your photo was switched?"

"NG..."

"Ever think it was her?? She does sort of like you" (She brought him donuts one day, and I'm trying to convince him that NG likes him, haha! She doesn't, but it's still amusing, at least to me)

"I can't believe she would do that! She's been here a week, she's got balls! Ohhh, it's so on between me and her!"

....And that my friends, is how evil I am. Of course I was the one to change the photo. Would I admit that? Never! Would I throw someone else under the bus to save my butt from an angry Bill? You know it!

Stayed tuned to see what happens to NG.... any thoughts?? Think Bill will "get even?"